Wednesday, December 19, 2012

6 days till Christmas!



Holy crow...seriously?! 6 days till Christmas?! My gosh, I have no idea where time has gone. All of these days have just melted into one another...and we are just filling every waking hour with work and cleaning, and organizing, and planning, and phone calls. And then as the day winds down and our heads hit the pillow we both fall asleep knowing that we're going to do the same thing all over again once that sun rises.

But Aaron and I have always been workhorses. We're not too big on sleep. The midnight oil is always burning. And there are lots and lots of irons in the fire at all times. Only now things are a bit heavier. I know Aaron has his own set of coping skills, but I think my are being put to the test. I'm definitely in that strange state of being on the verge of tears at all times. And they could equally be good tears or bad ones. Sometimes it actually takes me a few minutes to figure out which type they are. Any long time readers of this blog will know that I have suffered from panic/anxiety disorder since my twenties. I have come a very long way, largely due to my artistic output and the great response from this art community. ( You can read my Art Saves story from a few years ago here. )

Hurricane Sandy brought so many things back to the surface for me...and for us. And the tragedy in Connecticut absolutely floored me for days. For the east coast I feel like things have just been so so heavy. You can easily slip up and let yourself get so overwhelmed with thoughts and emotions. For us bleeding hearts these are scary times and we must be responsible. We can't let our emotions run away on us. You really have to convince yourself to keep up a strong front and realize that life is short and uncertain and every moment spent in paralyzing fear is a wasted moment. Cherish every moment. Cherish the little things. Cherish everyday...Celebrate Everyday! 



One thing that has served as such amazing medicine for us is our work. Our fabulous customers really pulled through for us in a pinch and took advantage of our big hurricane relief sale when we needed them most. It's crazy that we have all these orders to fill and we have no studio in which to fill them. Our home and home studio could best be described as construction sites/ disaster areas. Luckily Aaron's parents are totally awesome and they have let us commandeer their dining room table. ( you can see a tiny peek of it above with a handful of orders being prepped on it's surface! ) Aar's parents, aka Barb & Skip, have been so so generous with their time and space. We pretty much commute across town to their house every single morning and put in our work day there. And don't let me insinuate that we're only occupying their dining table. We've hijacked lots of corners and tabletops and any nooks and crannies that we could get our hands on over there! And poor Skip!...we did this to him at precisely the wrong time of year. You should see him running around trying to decorate the house for Christmas around us.


Our tree full of treasured ornaments.

Which leads me to a topic that has been weighing heavy on my heart. It's so strange how much it has effected me...the simple sad fact that Aaron and I do not have a Christmas tree this year. Yep...Jenny Holiday has no Christmas tree! My tree is my pride and joy. I have been collecting vintage and handmade ornaments for as long as I can remember. Over the years, through swaps with some friends here in blogland I've received some incredibly beautiful ornaments, and purchased some treasured pieces on etsy and at craft shows and events like Silver Bella.

Here is our tree from a few years ago...

 I have so much amazing Christmas stuff!  Vintage bottle brush trees, and mercury glass, tinsel trees, my absolute favorite quirky handmade vintage felt tree skirt. And there are ornaments that Aaron and I bought together for our first apartment years and years ago. And even without all the fab stuff...I'm totally in love with my artificial white tree. It's like a member of the family that we get to see only once a year during this special time.


Some treasured ornaments and a table top tree.



Our dreamy Holiday mantel. 


A happy collection of trees...gosh I loved them.

This is our dining room...two apartments ago. 

 Yes, I applied the past tense to the previous sentence. : ( Because it turns out that Aaron and I lost our tree and all of our decorations to Hurricane Sandy. We had been holding out hope that this wasn't the case...but sadly...heartbreakingly so, it's all gone. We had it all in storage in a garage at our old apartment.

 Every time that I start thinking about it all I get so so sad. And it's not only my Christmas stuff, but all of my favorite and equally amazing Halloween decor. Lots of vintage stuff from the 50s...lots of folk art pieces from Wendy Addison, and Nicole Sayre, and Dee Foust. Oh gosh, I just am so saddened by it.  And I also feel terrible knowing that so many families have lost so much more than we did. This just kinda came as an awful aftershock. I know I can collect things again, and replace some things, but it's the memories that I'll miss the most.

ahh...gosh..well what can you do? I hope that by this time next year we will have a new tree and new old ornaments and sparkly things that will bring joy to countless future holidays. 


The Holidays are so special to me. I cry a lot...and they're definitely the good kind of tears. I love getting Christmas cards from our amazingly sweet friends! Here are some that had us crying like babies.

Gosh it's late! We're up in our new cozy bedroom...which is the warmest room in the house being that it's on the second floor, which still has insulation. Tomorrow morning we might have the insulation guys coming over to re-do our crawl space. Right now, if we are able to stay awake we just might watch Men in Black 3...that's the one with Josh Brolin playing a young Tommy Lee Jones...looks like fun!
xoxo, Jenny

31 comments:

  1. Girl, You are about to make me cry! I just typed this huge mushy sentimental thing.. and I erased it. I am probably going to type another long mushy comment again so here I go! I am so sorry you lost so much in this storm. However, you are so strong, smart, and have so much wisdom! You are going to come out of this better than you can even imagine. You are pulling off in the middle of a crisis what some of us cannot even accomplish on a good day! It is a testament to your fighting spirit! My hugs, thoughts, and support are with you! Your posts through out this ordeal have been so helpful for me as I deal with my own set of Sandy Problems... I thank you for being so strong and an inspiration
    (I respect your honesty! I am so inspired by it. Your honesty about your anxiety has just made me feel so much better about myself. YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH READING THAT ONE LINE HAS HELPED ME WITH MY OWN ANXIETY, and shame!) THANK YOU AGAIN!

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  2. My prayers are with you. You are such an inspiration. YOU ARE SO SPOT ON with this post. I am so sorry that you lost your tree and so much from Sandy. I am at a loss for words, I just wish I could make it all come back and everything better! I can only promise, when we go through these things, we eventually look back and find that we are better people in the end. Like that saying, what does not kill you will make you stronger... You are one tough little woman, but I know fighting and fighting is so tiring (especially when you don't pick the fight)

    Hang in there! HUGS AND POSITIVE ENERGY!

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  3. Jenny, "Everyday Is a Holiday" remember? So you must get yourself a new white tree, even after the official "Christmas" maybe a great after Christmas Sale. Your Blog was one of the first Blogs that inspired me to Blog.. So sorry for your loss. Hugs & Kisses, Diane

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  4. Oh, I really feel for you! A similar thing happened to me once. I had gone to my sister's house to get my Christmas things that were being stored at her house. I stopped at work (a bank) to help decorate on my way home and then out for drinks.

    I didn't notice on the way to the bar or the way home, but all the things in my backseat had been stolen. All of my Christmas had been stolen out of my car. Ornaments I made when I was married and this was the first Christmas after my divorce. A large nativity that my mother hand painted for me. Many, many things that I had collected over the years.

    A few days later the called a staff meeting at the bank. My desk was in the lobby which is where the meeting was so I just sat and waited. As everyone came to the meeting, they all had Christmas ornaments in their hands for me, some of them even off their own trees. Some gave cash so I could buy some. I just couldn't believe the love and kindness that they showed to me. I hadn't only been working there for 6 mos. I barely new some of the people!

    I know that you have a lot of people in your life that love you like that and I know that you know that. You are a very blessed person. Losing all of those things gave me the opportunity to collect new memories and you will too!!!

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  5. I just found your post on facebook. I am holding back the tears! A friend of mine says "everything happens for a reason", when things are not going well. I'm not sure what the reason for hurricane Sandy was, but I wish you well for 2013, Happy Christmas and a Peaceful new year, Sue x

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  6. So sorry about your decorations... *sigh* that just breaks my heart....

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  7. I know that feeling well of being at the verge of tears all the time and I haven't been put to the test as you have. I'm so sorry you lost your treasured holiday memories in the storm. They really do become a part of you and your holiday traditions. You have a wonderful supportive family and I hope your life is put back together soon and maybe, just maybe, it will be better than ever.

    Vickie :@

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  8. @Maggie of Vintage Core Patterns Oh goodness, thank you so so much for your beyond kind and sweet and lovely words...anf the vote of confidence. It feels so good having such awesome souls cheering for us.
    Thank you!!!!

    XOXO

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  9. @Maggie Thank you so much for visiting and reading and your wonderful comforting supportive words! I appreciate it so so much! Thank you!!!

    Love to you!!

    xo

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  10. @Diane Mars Big Big hugs!!!! Thank you!! Gosh Thank you! You have me crying over here. Thank you!!

    xo

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  11. @Christine Oh thank you so so much for sharing your story. Heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time. Oh I am just a ball of tears over here. Thank you so much!!

    Love to you!! Merry Christmas!

    xo

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  12. @Talulahblue Accessories Thank you sweet friend. I too believe that everything happens for a reason. It may take some time to figure out what it is....but we just have to have faith and trust. It's going to be a long hard road for so many here, but we just have to move forward and dream of happier days and making new memories. Thank you SO much!!!

    Love to you!!
    xo

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  13. @Julie Tucker Wolek Thank you so much! I can always count on you for a hug and a high five! Thank you!

    LOVE ya!!
    xo

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  14. @Vickie @Ranger911 gosh, thank you. I really appreciate your kindness and friendship and support! :) We really are so lucky...I know that. and I thank the heavens and stars daily. This aftershock really shook me up...but I'm moving forward...blogging this helped me.

    Thank you my friend!
    XOXO

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  15. @Ellen Gosh..LOVE you too!!!! XOXOXOXO

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  16. I love you two so much!!!! You inspire me!!

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  17. Oh Jenny I wish I could just give you a big hug right now! I know material things are just that but sometimes we get more attached to things than we thought. It still hurts when we lose them so suddenly. The later half of this year was definitely a tough one.

    And I agree with Diane M - this is a great opportunity to start fresh and create new memories (you'll never lose the old ones right?)

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  18. Dearest Jenny, I am so sorry to hear about the loss of all your treasured holiday decorations and gorgeous white tree! That is so sad! As you said, the memories attached are the part that makes it extra hard. You are a strong girl, and such a sweetheart, too. I know you will be even stronger after all this hardship because you have such a good attitude and spirit. I know you will have fun collecting new goodies this year and new memories to go with them.
    Michelle xoxo

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  19. Sandy came in like the Grinch this year with the holidays and just about everything else! I can't imagine..keeping you and Aaron in my glittery thoughts...xo

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  20. Ow so sad to hear about your decorations! Be sure to make new memories soon while collecting new ones. And treasure the memories you had as well. Keep strong!

    Hug
    Susie

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  21. My family knows your heartbreak and it will always be a little tinge of sadness about it. I know this because my sister lost everything she had in a house fire. It was a perfect 100 year old farm house full of all the precious items that she had collected her whole life. And her home insurance had just lapsed, unknown to her and she had no insurance to cover anything. Periodically she will see pictures of things and say " I used to have one of those" it makes me sad for her but she has bounced back remarkably well and believe it or not she has amassed a large collection again . She has a nack for finding awesome vintage things. And friends and family that provided in her time of need. Thinking of you in your time of need and wishing I could help.

    Vintagehoneybee.blogspot.com

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  22. I'm so sorry that you lost your Christmas memories *sigh*

    That only thing that I can tell you is to start new Christmas memories. It is hard, I know.

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  23. Hi Jenny,

    This year's heartaches and sorrows have led me to the manger more than ever to focus on what Christmas is--Jesus coming to this earth for such times as these--to save us and comfort us and help us, because we couldn't do it ourselves. I've worried about you and prayed for you and thought about you much. I can see Him pouring out blessings and help and grace on you and Aaron.

    Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke [is] easy, and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30

    Merry Christmas,
    May your days be Merry & Bright <3
    Loretta

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  24. those swiss cake rolls on the table looked real! i wanted to eat them :)

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  25. Oh, Jenny. I'm so sorry to hear this.

    Don't feel bad about being so upset. Yes, other families may have lost more but that doesn't make your loss any less important.

    I'm big on Christmas so I understand how much emotional attachment can come into it.

    I'm thinking of you

    Becky
    xx

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  26. Jenny Dear, You are the reason I have a blog of my own and finally found my way into creating things that I sell and pay the bills with- YOU. So, I would like to send you something for your new tree. Please. I need an address, please email me. pbvanchance@hotmail.com

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  27. thank you for sharing your story, it is sad to lose things you cherish but I'm so glad you and your love survived the storm. You both have the such great creative skills and generous spirit. I wish you a wonderful Christmas x Luna

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  28. Oh, how awful...all those precious memories and beautiful ornaments. I'm so sorry lovely. xoxoxo

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  29. Love you Jenny girl! Keep that chin up! In my neck of the woods Jan-August is the BEST time to get vintage ornaments from flea, estate and swap sales. I'll have to surprise you in time for Christmas next year! Wish you all the best. Our prayers are STILL with you love!

    xoxo Molly (and Kyle!)

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  30. aww next year will be better. it simply has to be. i bet you are super glad you have the photos still. stay strong. i hope you find new treasures that you love as much as the old ones.

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